Blowing Up...and not in a good way, like Britney's comeback album.

This is a picture of me on my wedding day. I did not lose alot of weight for my wedding, and no one would have accused me of being "skinny" by any means. But certainly, small children would not have run from me fearing my obesity. I was pretty happy being a little pudgy.

But dear Lord...What the hell has happened?!?



I don't look like I am with child as much as I look like I ate a child. And am I also giving birth to a pair of boobs? Sweet Mother of Pearl...what is the deal with the boob growth?

And this is going to get worse?!? Consider this post a public service announcement. I am not commenting one way or the other for those deciding to have children or not. I am just offering some information to assist in the making of an informed decision.

And does anyone know...will my bra size go back to normal? Lie to me people...lie to me!

Unadulterated Happiness

I just didn't realize how much love we were capable of until I saw this little person.

Criag's List

So I love Pottery Barn. Who Doesn't? But $700 for a crib? Come on people. That house in New Jersey didn't come with a money tree in the back yard. So my cheapness and intelligence teamed up to come up with a solution. And that solution is called Craig's List.

I got a crib:



Retails for $700 at Pottery Barn (plus shipping and handling)
Retailed on Craig's List for $250 (my husband didn't charge me for shipping and handling).



I also got a Changing Table: Which came with 4 of the Pottery Barn Sabrina Baskets and 8 Liners for those baskets.



Retails at Pottery Barn for $250 (changing table); $128 (baskets); and $80 Liners
Retailed on Craig's List for $200 total (plus, again, I got the husband discount on shipping)



Not to be stopped there, I got a BRAND NEW IN THE BOX POTTERY BARN ROCKING CHAIR:



This retails at Pottery Barn for $600
Retails on Craig's List for $300 (did I mention that it was BRAND NEW IN THE BOX AND NEVER USED?) I was so excited I almost carried this home myself! But that free shipping from my husband made that unnecessary.



And Finally, a Bassinett (Mine is with Green trim)(do you sense the green theme?) Also, this was unused! BRAND NEW...I am getting sweaty just thinking about it!:



Retails for $350 at Pottery Barn
Retails on Craig's List for $100



Prior to the nursery purchases (each separate finds), I have never used Craig's List before. Where have I been? I'll tell you where I have been...going broke in Pottery Barn, that's where. I can't be stopped now! I will conquer the world through Craig's List!

Well until my husband puts his foot down. Which he did last night when we picked up the crib and the woman told us she still had all the Pottery Barn bedding and just as my eyes lit up and I was about to yell "HELL YES!" my rational husband politely declined and then said to me:

"I draw the line at sheets. We are getting the baby NEW SHEETS"

Fine. Whatever. Be that way. Besides, I can afford nice sheets what with all the money I saved on Craig's List.

Sudafed

To take Sudafed or Not to take Sudafed. This is the question.

The doctor (who I am not that thrilled with) has come down on the side of taking the damn Sudafed already and stop calling me with questions about things you read on the internet.

But the internet, and another pregnant friend of mine have said Sudafed is dangerous. Although this friend is not a doctor and the internet was inconclusive...

While the debate rages on, I am in a state of super sickness. Holy Crap Sickness. The kind of sickness where your own mother comes in the room and says "Ew...you don't look good." I mean, you expect it from your queasy husband, but your own Mother? Et tu Mater? But the woman makes a mean matzo ball soup, so I am going to let her slide just this once.

I have decided not to take the Sudafed. As a result, I am white knuckling my way through this cold/flu/plague/death march of germs. I think my inability to get out of bed is directly related to the lack of Sudafed. Is it wrong to want to give the baby to my husband to carry for the remainder of this cold?

I never take a sick day from work. I don't know why, but I really never do. I can't say that it has ever been that much of an issue since I rarely get bed ridden sick on a weekday (lucky me!). But for the past two Sudafed deprived days, I laid in bed...unable to move or to see (Let this be a lesson to all you contact wearers out there...do not leave contacts in when you are sick and have weepy watering eyes. An infection will ensue the likes of which will make your eyes crust and swell shut. And your husband will be disgusted by this. But on the good side, you won't be able to actually SEE his disgust - what with the being swollen and crusty and BLIND).

Today I feel slightly better and so braved a monsoon to come to work. Where the receptionist promptly pulled what will heretofore be known as a "mom" by saying "Eww...you look HOOORRRIBLE!"

Et tu Receptionae?


PS: KidKate, can I take a Sudafed?...Please feel free to weigh in on what our European counterparts think!

Nose Hair

On a warm spring morning almost two years ago, I was in our bathroom when I noticed a small mechanical device that looked like a pen. When I asked my husband what it was, he told me it was a nose hair trimmer. I questioned no further, and he offered no additional explanation.

Two days later, I used it. I did not read the instructions, nor did I ask for a tutorial. I had never before trimmed my nose hair...but who amongst us wouldn't have tried that out?

I have had no nose hair for the past two years.

Apparently, unbeknownst to me at the time, you are only supposed to lightly trim the hairs that are at the edge of the nostril. I, however, living by wits alone, decided to trim EVERY LAST HAIR from inside my nose. Right...yes...those school loan payments are really seeming worthwile now!

Did you know that nose hair doesn't really grow back? Now you do. Did you also know that nose hair serves an important purpose of keeping our noses relatively unstuffed? Well you do now. Needless to say, it has been two years of hell which has included extensive noseblowing each morning.

Early on in my pregnancy, I learned that pregnancy makes your hair grow thicker and longer...I found this to be true. My hair is like a weed at this point, and the shaving is required more often...but I do not notice it any place more than in my nose.

There is a definite upside to preganancy. I just never figured it would be related to nose hair.